


Failed

by Cuillere



Series: 15 days of Hurt and Comfort Kylo (Tumblr, @hurtkylofest) [3]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Confusion, Gen, Hurt, LFF Comment Project
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-04
Updated: 2018-03-04
Packaged: 2019-03-26 21:53:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 698
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13866753
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cuillere/pseuds/Cuillere
Summary: Kylo is held prisoner by the Resistance, cut off from the Force. Luke come into his cell and apologizes.





	Failed

**Author's Note:**

> Some more for @hurtkylofest ! :)
> 
> Day 3 was Broken promises and Luke apologizes for what happened on the night of their confrontation
> 
> I’m not entirely happy with it, but I really like the topic and since it’s written, why not publish it :) There’s definitely hurt and confusion, but no comfort.

It had already shaken Kylo to the bone when he had suddenly been deprived of his most used sense, but two days had been long enough to leave him thoroughly hopeless. He was the only one to blame for his lack of prudence, after all.  
  
He loathed again his lack of capacity when he heard the footsteps coming. Kylo hesitated to stand, he knew his anger would fuel him, compensating for the lack of food and sleep. But he didn’t.  
He loathed his helplessness even more when he recognized Skywalker. His former master stopped upon entering, looking around the cell. His eyes darted around but avoided Kylo. The latter felt somehow comforted by his presence.  
  
_At least, he’s deprived of it too._  
  
Skywalker seemed to hesitate for an instant and sat on the chair, putting himself at Kylo’s level.  
He then took a deep inspiration.  
  
“Ben, I…”  
“Kylo,” he corrected harshly.  
  
Skywalker exhaled, stopped in his tracks.  
When he resumed talking, Kylo noticed that he avoided the topic of his name entirely.  
  
“I think you should know that I failed you.”  
  
Kylo’s head shot up. He certainly did not expect that from his former master.  
He gazed at the man, trying to figure out what he hoped to achieve, or what he expected from Kylo.  
Luke was keeping his eyes on the ground, though. He sighed.  
  
“I had a doubt. I shouldn’t have. I shouldn’t have doubted you. This is why I was there, that night.”  
  
Kylo’s heart was beating hard. He did want to believe him, to blame him for everything, but he couldn’t bring himself to. Luke could not… Skywalker had to be lying. He was trying to get something from Kylo. Weaken him, probably.  
  
“I was scared.”  
  
Trying to steady his breathing, Kylo closed his eyes.  
  
_What the hell?_  
  
He was so surprised by the confession that he couldn’t exactly understand what was going on. He certainly could not fully grasp the implications.  
He pinched his eyes and willed himself to not hear Luke anymore.  
  
“I’m… I’m sorry. I’m sorry you had to pay the price for my doubts, for my failure. I had promised to teach and protect you. And I failed.” Luke exhaled again. He sounded tired.  
“I failed you. I’ve been wanting to tell you for so long. The guilt has been eating me ever since. I’m sorry.”  
  
He hated the tears rolling down his cheeks. Not only were they proof that he had failed, but they proved his weakness. Whatever Luke had done, he had done it to Ben, and Ben was dead. He was not Ben. He could not.  
He hated that Luke was not lying. He hated that Luke was here.  
They both looked up and their eyes met. Kylo’s were red and angry but his sight was clear enough to see Luke’s were watery. The frustration and anger waved harshly in him and more tears fell from his eyes.  
  
“Why tell me this? Why now? What do you expect?”  
  
Luke’s eyes widen a bit.  
  
“It’s my first occasion to,” he stated.  
  
The simple truth shocked Kylo silent.  
It was the first time they met since then. The first time they were not fighting, at least.  
Did Luke mean everything? If so, what were the implications? Was Luke trying to convince him that the Dark side had not been so prominent in him? And if that were true, did that imply anything for Kylo? That certainly would explain the Light’s pulls. Kylo was deep in his thoughts and started when Luke spoke again.  
  
“I just wanted you to know. Know that it was never your fault.”  
  
How could he doubt his master so easily? How could he doubt himself like that? It was just a few words. All of that had happened so long ago anyway. Kylo looked up at Luke again. His shoulders were slumped and his eyes were heavy. Despite his wanting to deny it, despite his lack of connection to the Force, Kylo could feel the truth coming from Luke. And that was were the doubt came from.  
Because if Luke was telling the truth, then Kylo had been built from a misunderstanding. From a mistake.

**Author's Note:**

> This story is part of the [LLF Comment Project](https://longlivefeedback.tumblr.com/llfcommentproject), which was created to improve communication between readers and authors. This author invites and appreciates feedback, including:  
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